Tuesday, 28 July 2009

My Fukitol Has Arrived!

Regular readers know that my veins are really suffering because of chemo and canulas, I was advised to do hand exercises so decided to purchase a stress ball. I couldn't resist this stress ball which arrived from Amazon UK today. I can do my "vein" exercises with a smile on my face!!!

Mike Peters The Stand
I had to share this video of Mike Peters performing "The Stand" in New York the other day. Amazing. The Stand is based on the book of the same name by Stephen King. This guy is a Cancer Survivor a Cancer Fighter - he never ceases to amaze me! His strength, courage, determination - my rock!
Last night I watched "Haunting in Connecticut" - mistake in my current situation!
I thought it was a good old horror movie, which I love and it was but I didn't bargain for the main heroes being cancer fighters. It portrayed cancer and its treatment in its worst way. For me, I had mixed emotions as the reverand in the film told the boy "we are walking in the shadow of death" and "we are on the edge of death" - I have never thought of this in my cancer fight, I don't feel as though I am "walking in the valley of death", I don't feel as though my life is under attack! Should I? Am I fooling myself? Or is it a safety mechanisim kicking in and the reality will hit me when my treatment is over? Who knows? Who cares? Fukitol, I am enjoying life!
On a final note; the post man who delivers my post every day is funny. A young, fit and healthy lad, he runs his rounds! I used to run past him, now I just answer the door in my dressing gown and with my bald head. He has his hair graded really short and its the same colour as mine so when I answered to door to get my FUKITOL, I asked him "have I got more than you then?" and we both had a genuine laugh!


  1. No, no, no. I never felt as if I were under attack. You just keep on keeping on and don't lose your sense of humor. Hey. If you want a good horror movie, might I suggest 'The Changeling' with George C. Scott?

  2. Now THAT is a stress ball and it's perfect for you!!! Every time you use it you will smile and smiling releases good, healthy edorphins!!! That you are joking with your mail carrier about hair is always a good sign..that your sense of humour will not be compromised...ever!!

    As for walking in the valley of the shadow...I did feel that very fine line between life and death during my initial discory and diagnosis. Then I refused to think about death and dying while being treated...I was being treated to continue living and continued to live while I was being treated...very important to do. Now that I am 2 years post treatment and moving further back into the mainstream of life every day, I do think about death. What I know is this -- there comes an acceptance that time is short, that life isn't always what we think it is going to be. I made my peace with life and I made my peace with death. I was doing that before breast cancer after my parents and my sister died leaving me "oprhaned" with only my husband and children...but the cancer was my chance to make my very personal peace with the fact. Having done that I fear nothing. And there is a sense of peace. You are still in the treatment stage...you aren't ready to come to grips with any of that. Nor should you be. Just wanted you to know that at some point you'll face it and you'll be surprised I expect at how easy it is for you to acknowledge it and move on. ♥

  3. awesome stress ball, enjoy!!

  4. Thanks all for your comments. Sherry, you are such a star! Your support means the world to me, always giving good advice. I lost my brother 19 years old and it was like losing a limb xx

  5. Fukitol indeed! We all need humor dealing with this, don't we?

  6. Too cute ... you keep that postie entertained.

  7. I love the stress ball !! Very Funny!! It's funny because I never really used to think about death that much and now it's always there in the back of my mind just in case....
    Your postman has a good sense of humour....
    Alli xx

  8. LOL! So funny! I think I'm going to stop by my doctors office today to see if he can write me a script for some Fukitol. I'll need it when I go back to work tomorrow! ;-)


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