sigh.....

This cheeky chap is my youngest son, Harry Llewelyn (named after two great Princes). He is going to be 9 years old on Friday and I can't believe how fast the time has flown.

Harry was diagnosed with autism a few years ago and has help at school. He struggles with language and communication and this doesnt just mean the spoken word, it covers social language, gestures, the unwritten code of conduct... He also struggles with change so any change in routine no matter how minor will affect his sleeping patterns and his behaviour.

So as his birthday approaches, I have had a testing time with Harry. His behaviour during these periods of unrest push me beyond comprehension. Today, I am struggling with a tension headache and feeling sick, my tummy is all knotted up.

I know that a birthday should be fun and eagerly anticipated. Harry doesn't really know when his birthday is, he still isn't sure when his party will take place and this confusion leaves him anxious.

So only a couple of days to go and hopefully the storm will have passed.

Back Again!

Back again after another break but I can't tell you how busy I am these days! The children are into their second week back at school and I am able to do all the things I am not able to when they are around.

The good news is that at my Weight Watchers weigh in last week, I lost 4lbs! I had to get on and off the scales 4 times before I would accept the reading and then I jumped up and down for joy, the other members must have thought I was bonkers. I am keeping on track with my diet and exercising alot. Rather than use my car I am walking or cycling and its amazing what an impact that has had on my weight loss.

Cola is wonderful! We took his rugs off last week. We still put his stable rug on at night because it tends to be chilly but during the day he is comando! You can tell the spring grass is coming through because he is totally fixated and is chomping at the bit to go out to grass rather than have his bucket feed which he normally enjoys.

The boys and I spent the weekend at my friends house on the top of a mountain. We camped in their back garden but oooh it was cold at night. Luckily I had quite a few glasses of red wine so the cold didn't get to me too much!

I have left my camara at my friends though so my blog will be pictureless for a while until I get it back unless I can find any appropriate pictures in my archives.

More herceptin on Wednesday; dose 10 out of 18 so I am over half way there.

I am part of the Secret Post club and I received my parcel last week which was so touching! However, I want to share the pictures with you before I tell you more and the picture is on my camara so you will have to bear with me for the next few days.

Cola is Here

It has been a mad few days since Wednesday! We traveled to Uttoxteter in our rented horsebox to colloect our little man. It was quite emotional for his owner Karen as she clearly loves him to bits. He loaded beautifully and we took our time on the return journey because of our precious cargo. He seemed so relaxed on arrival and enjoyed the fuss Joe and Harry gave him. The owner of the yard said that he checked on Cola at 11.30pm that night and he was very relaxed.


It was so hard organising the logistics of getting Cola home, I totally forgot that I had a herceptin infusion due that day. Luckily the staff at the Shooting Star Unit accommodated me and allowed me to change my day to the Thursay morning at 9am. So I left Jason, Joe and Harry with a list of instructions and Cola was fine.


I have had 7 infusions of herceptin now so only 11 more to go! The doctor tried my chemo arm first of all and although he got a line in and was able to draw out blood there was no flush back therefore the vein wasn't able to support an infusion so my compromised arm it was (again). I have been suffering with really sore eyes recently and he was so kind, he prescribed me some eye antibiotics. That saves me a trip to the doctor which I am glad of considering the fact that I have 3 hospital appointments next week, one to see the Oncologist, one to see the Surgeon and the other for my heart scan.


So today we turned Cola out into the paddock for the first time and he was eager to get out there. He has suffered with bouts of laminitus over the last 2 years so as you can imagine I am quite anxious as to how he will get on with the grazing. We will be going back there in an hour to put his bed down, get him in, clean the poo from his paddock and feed him. We are loving Coca Cola so much!

A Good Weekend

I was just looking through some of my video clips and I found this one of Harry which made me giggle! He is running and running but its the look on his face that makes me smile!

We have had a good weekend so far with few melt downs. Jasons mum came yesterday and we had a nice chat, she took the boys out around the village. They went to Christ Church, Rossett where Harry went into the pulpit and recited the Lords Prayer. They then said a little prayer of thanks for my good health - thats nice. I don't know if you have seen a picture of my crosses but the boys got me one each last year on one of their Nana expeditions. I have framed them and they are above my bed. They are hand carved and proceeds went to help others.

We had our pizza night but I made the mistake of changing the "make" of pizza which didn't go down well with Harry. I tried to tell him it was the same as usual but there's no fooling him!

Today the boys have been horse riding. Joe rode Cracker and Harry rode Red Robin. They had a good lesson, the sun was shining and it was a lovely day to ride. We stopped off at Farm & Pet to buy some rabbit food and now we are home, doing our own things!

Life after cancer. I think you open up your mind once you have faced your own mortality, you free your spirit and see only the good life has to offer. I am blessed with good friends who keep me flying high!

On that note...................... wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Friday Shoot Out - FENCES

I am so sorry, I have had an eventful week this week and as a result, haven't been able to get shooting. However, I have rummaged through my archive!

Above is a picture taken on the mountain in Llanarmon. You can just about make out the fence and the old gate.

Taken in the summer in Erddig Estate. The fence is made of iron and much nicer than the wire ones we see so frequently these days.

The geese at the Equestrian Centre where the boys ride. Fences will be made out of anything you can find, in this case an old gate held together with baling twine.

My favourite place, Erddig Hall. This doorway leads into the formal gardens from the working courtyard.

A very nice gate and fence from Erddig Hall. This is the old entrance to the Hall.

Poppy, Pickles and Wilbur in Darland Woods just 5 minutes walk from my house. You can see the reflection of the fencing on the woodland floor.

My Town Friday Shoot Out - Under Construction

This weeks assignment is "Under Construction".

Well my PANDORA bracelet which is pictured above is most definately under construction. It tells the story of my fight with Breast Cancer. My best friend bought me the bracelet and the breast cancer charm. Each bead marks a significant chapter in my life, the first red one was when I finished Epi-Reubison, the rabbit next to it was when I finished CMF and the hedgehog was for when my hair began to grow back, the love heart was our 15th wedding anniversary and the day of my last but one round of chemo, the coloured one next to it was given to me by my husband because I had such a rough time with that particular round of chemo. I will be leaving a bead space free for when I get my 5 years all clear from cancer!

Me? Well I am most definately UNDER CONSTRUCTION in 2010. I have to shed 2 stone, I want my hair to grow and I am going to get my teeth sorted out! You see, last Christmas I finished 3 years of brace work and just had them removed, I was waiting until my teeth settled before I was going to have some veneers, a cap and replacement fillings. Cancer and its treatment put the cap on that but I promised myself this year that it would get done!

This is my best friend Jan in the pottery centre in Centre Parcs. She is in the middle of painting me a red mini!

...and this is the finished product. She has copied every aspect of my own Mini Cooper including the tinted rear windows. The only difference was the slogan "GIRLS ROCK" across the bonnet!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL!

My Town Friday Shoot Out - Angels

This week I have been so busy preparing for Christmas that I haven't had time to take the pictures I would have liked to so I have dipped into my archive.

My horse "MAC" pictured above is in Heaven now. He was such a darling horse, so kind and reliable, I would have trusted anybody on him.

My darling pony Shilo, was one of the loves of my life. I was given him because he was a naughty pony and as a rescue came hand in hand with a load of problems. We worked together and I turned him into the handsome King you see in this picture. He was my King, he was my first love.

These are my two little darling Angels. They give me a reason to live and a purpose in my life. They have kept me going this year through my fight with Breast Cancer. When my hair fell out they accepted me for who I was, never once making me feel ugly or unloved. They are my true little Angels.

In this picture is my big brother, Peter Geraint (the police constable). He died 19 years ago and I KNOW that he is my guardian angel, looking out for me on the other side!

My beautiful girl Bobbi! Now she really was an Angel sent to me by God. When I was a little girl I used to pray for a dog of my own. She would be small, she would be scruffy and she would be all mine...... Years and years later, my wish came true, in fact I always refered to her as "my gift from God" or "my wish come true". She got me through some difficult times, years of disappointment when we were trying for a baby. When at last I became pregnant with Joe, she got me through the labour, distracting me from my pain. She kept me company during the night feeds and was always at my side. When Joe was a few months, I found out that Bobbi had lymphoma at just 5 years old..... She died in August 1999 and I felt as though a light had been switched off in my heart. Looking back, I know that she was sent to me by God to help me through those terrible years and once her "job" was done, it was time for her to go back to Him. Ten long years have passed since she died and I think about her all the time. She is my darling Angel Bobbi.

Jules Update and Running with Wilbur

I received an email from Jules Peters today thanking me for the care package I sent out. She has been a very poorly young lady with not only DVT, tropical disease but also had a pulmonary embulism. She is lucky to be alive. She is recovering at home now with her young children and is doing well. These conditions were caused during her climb up Kilimanjaro to raise money for cancer. We are all set for the Gathering at the end of January 2010 in Prestatyn where I can hopefully meet her in person.

Today I went running with my dog Wilbur. I have had to have a few days off exercise as I injured my shoulder on Thursday having tripped up over Mr Wilbur. I landed on my shoulder and it is still incredibly painful, very hard for me to get dressed or put a coat on. However, I had a good run and enjoyed it even more for having his company. He had to wear is flourescent tabard because he is the colour of tarmac and whilst motorists on the lane may see me, they may miss the little guy.

A very productive day.... I am feeling stronger and fitter with each new day and I am so happy to be able to do the things I love once again.

My Town Friday Shoot Out - Weather

I took these photos about 10 minutes ago! Sorry they are a bit dull and grey but thats exactly what the weather is like over here...... dull and grey!

Thankfully we had a nice, thick frost last night so I was able to take advantage of it for my shoot out. I love frosted grass and leaves, I like the way that the frost highlights each vein within the leaf.

My neighbours garden opposite my house. Look at the way the frost has settled on the top of his ornamental tree.

I tried to capture the frosty haze over the car park opposite us but I just couldn't get the lighting quite right. As I said before...... dull and grey!

I just had to get a picture in of my new toy. Yep, Cooper got frosted last night too!

Going Out Tonight!

www.goldenlionrossett.co.uk

(picture courtesy of google search engine)


Tonight I am out with the ladies from the Breast Cancer Support Group and we are going to a local pub/resteraunt within my village called the Golden Lion. The Golden Lion is pictured above and if you follow the link to the web page you can have a look at the Christmas menu of which we will be partaking tonight!

The Golden Lion was formerly a coaching inn as it is situated on the main Wrexham to Chester road. The views of the village green can be seen from the pubs forecourts although these days the green is a childrens play area and football pitch. Once upon a time though, public executions took place on the village green and the beam used to hang one local person was used within the pub itself. Local rumours say that the ghost of the hanged person still haunts the pub today!

My Weight Watchers leader said to us last week that this pub should come with a Weight Watchers Health Warning because the portion sizes are enormous!

Tonight, If memory serves me right I am going to have the goats cheese thingy as a starter, a cremated steak for the main course and a Christmas mess to end! I will let you know how I get on but needless to say I wont be expecting a weight loss at the scales this week!

Christmas Plays!

(Images courtesy of google search engine)


I am feeling quite teary and emotional thinking about my chosen topic today.

When I was a child, they did have nativity plays but I was never chosen to be in them and I was glad because I was too shy to perform on stage. I remember once when I was about 4 years old, sitting cross legged in assembly. Our headmistress "Mrs Henderson" said that we were to perform the "Three Billy Goats Gruff" and whoever was sitting up the straightest would be a billy goat. I instantly sat up straight but almost simultaneously realised what this would entail and slouched my biggest slouch...... Too late! Mrs Henderson had seen me and I became the littlest Billy Goat Gruff much to my horror.


While helping out at Sunday school when the boys were young, the best time of year was Christmas..... The lighting of the advent candles and rehearsals for plays. My oldest son Joe was always a Shepherd and costumes were duly made for the role. The first nativity Harry appeared in was at the age of 18 months and he was a sheep. Now..... I am not a seamstress by any far reach of the imagination but I was determined to make Harry a sheeps costume. My Auntie Heather gave me some immitation sheep material and I set about my task. The end result was a balaclava style head with ears attached, propped at a very "cheeky" angle. The top was a big and just for fun I "branded" Harry's bottom using red paint with the letter "H", he had a little sheeps tail and the trousers to match. I painted his little nose black with a bit of my eye liner. Oh what fun we had that year! My little sheep would not sit with the others, in fact he would not sit still. My little sheep was chased up and down the aisles, eventually lieing on his back, kicking his legs in the air. Needless to say, there wasn't a dry eye in the audience.......


My number one son has been at St Peters School in Rossett since the age of 3 1/2. He started off at nursery, then worked his way through reception and he is now in his final year before high school. What memories I have to treasure. All of the nativity plays he has been part of over the years and the costumes I have had to put together. This year, the school is putting on their adaptation of "Scrooge" and my Joe is Tiny Tim. Quite appropriate for him really as despite being one of the oldest in the class, he is the smallest!

Tonight I have been sewing patches on old school trousers, cutting fingers off old gloves and putting together a costume for him to wear for his dress rehearsal tomorrow. Jason has made him a crutch out of an old wooden broom.

I feel so sad.


This is the last nativity play he will ever do at primary school. St Peters has been such a huge part of Joe's life and always will be. He is surrounded by friends who he has known since the days of mother and toddler groups. Happy memories and treasured ones for me.

I am in awe of children today. Sure, we get the odd child bursting into tears or being overwhelmed by the sea of adult faces focusing on them. Harry tends to take part until he sees me then spends the entire time trying to hide from me or annoying the person in front of him.

These children pull off the most amazing plays, they learn their lines, sing their songs and all with such confidence and enjoyment. I could never have done what these children do today.

Come for a walk with me and my dogs......

Please feel free to click on any of the photographs to enlarge, I have imported them as small pictures because there were so many. I apologise for the blurring and colour issues but it was quite difficult to take photographs with 3 naughty dogs in tow! So this is the start of our walk, coming out of Lavister Walks.

We enter onto Darland Lane. When we first moved to Lavister Walks almost 15 years ago, there were no houses on the left but now it is quite built up.

These are my walking companions. Left to right: Wilbur, Pickles and Poppy.

We pass lots of blackberry bushes on our walk, some blackberries have past their best but others are still waiting to ripen. I must pick some to make some blackberry brandy for Christmas, its really lovely and makes nice gifts for friends.

These are the out buildings of Gamford Farm, it used to be a pig farm but has stopped working for a long while now. There were animal abuse issues and the place was closed down thankfully. I used to be able to hear the pigs squealing from my house and it wasn't pleasant.

The old sign for the farm which is as decrepit as the building itself is becoming over the years.

We walk quite a way down the lane before we come to the first set of cottages which is called the area of Trevalyn. Very pretty cottages but I wouldn't like to live in one because alot of commuters use the lane as a short cut and I think they think it is a race track!

We leave Gamford Lane and re-enter Darland Lane. There are fields full of horses and ponies, this one whinnied at us and alarmed the dogs. At this point, Pickles is allowed off her lead because it is a very narrow and quiet lane and she is a good dog..... Wilbur and Poppy are not to be trusted!

Trevalyn Farm, a really old farm house which has recently been restored. They converted the barns and outbuildings into flats and houses presumably to raise money for the refurbishment. The development is sweet but I think it has robbed the old farm house of some of its character.

I could not pass this hedgrow without taking a picture because the berries were in abundance and so pretty.

Here are my PINK sheep! I think the farmer must have either been drunk when he marked these sheep or it was raining and the colour has run!

I found this freshly dug hole in the hedgrow. It kind of turns off to the right. Not sure what sort of animal it belongs to but probably a rabbit.

One of my favourite trees along Darland Lane. Ancient oaks. One could stare at this tree the entire day and still wonder at its beauty and find different patterns, textures and life.

Sloe Berries, great for making Sloe Gin. I usually pick lots of these, freeze them then use them for my gin, again, another nice Christmas gift for friends. These should be picked after the first frost but as the weather has changed here in recent years, I prefer to pick them and freeze them myself.

We are approaching Darland Woods now, Pickles is checking that we are going the right way. The woods are on the right.

Just what the dogs have waited for. This is the entrance to the woods where all of the dogs are allowed off their leads. I am climbing over the style at this point while they have bounced off to sniff some smells.

Poppy has been squirrel and duck hunting and is about to re-join her "pack".

Wilbur sporting his leather head collar because he pulls so badly, a headcollar is a great way to control him without pressing on his neck. He tends to cough easily so I am concerned about any restriction put around his neck.

As we passed the lake, the sun hit the leaves of this tree and it looked so pretty, I had to take a picture of it.

We leave Darland Woods at this point and enter the Golf Course. It is a "pay as you go" golf course and has been in existance for almost 10 years. I remember it when it was agricultural land and one would hardly meet anyone on this walk, now you bump into golfers and other dog walkers so it has lost some of its charm for me. At least the golf course are planting trees and enhancing the environment but they have culled all of the rabbits and I have found some disturbing mole traps.

The entrance of the golf course and the exit for us! This is where the dogs go back onto their leads for safety because the main road ahead has a tendancy to be extremely busy.

Here we are on the main Chester Road, about 5 minutes walk from home and the end of our walk. The dogs are tired and so am I! So, I treat myself to an iced latte (skinny of course) with a dash of vanilla essence..... blissful x

Walking

Pickles

I had a wonderful walk today with the three dogs; Pickles, Wilbur and Poppy. It was a beautiful autumn day, the sky was blue, the sun was shining, it was just perfect.

While we were out on our walk, I marveled at all the wonderful things around me. The old, old Oak trees, holes in the ditches which must be somebodies home, blackberries on the bushes, elderberries and sloes.... it was lovely.

I have decided, that if I am blessed with another such day then I am taking my camera with me and I am going to take you all on my walk, so that I can share some of the lovely things I have seen.

I bumped into my friend Rachel with her daughter and their dog Molly so we had a lovely chat. I also saw Dave Golf, the greensman at the golf course and had a chat with him. It is so nice to be getting back to normal again.

Mind you, I over did things yesterday and now my breast and arm are aching and throbbing. I have taken it easy today, lets hope things are better tomorrow.

Oooh, almost forgot to mention.... I saw some pink sheep today as well! Hopefully I will be able to get a picture of them tomorrow!